Written by Brandi Marsh of Ebony and Pink Pearls for This Is Her Journey

Are you a single women dreading once again another year “being single” during the holidays? And during this festive holiday time you feel frustrated, while nursing thoughts of:

  • What are you gonna tell those nosey relatives who definitely mean well, but always ask “why aren’t you married yet?”
  • Where are you going to do to occupy your time to avoid feelings of loneliness because you do not have the special someone in your life?
  • When will day come for me to bring my guy to the family Holiday vacation?

As you contemplate on how to approach the holidays this season, it is very important to celebrate during this season in a way feel comfortable for you as a single person, whether you have that special someone in your life or not.

As you begin to see all the commercialism, decorations and your ears are bombarded with songs of holiday cheer, let the following holiday do’s and don’ts guide you.

Holiday Do’s for Singles

Instead of placing all of your energy on, “Why Am I Still Single”, focus on the real reason of Christmas; and that is the birth of our dear Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

Not to sound overly cliche, but He is, after all, the Reason for the season.

Jesus loves you so much; so as you begin to focus all your energy on Him, it will eliminate feelings of loneliness and start turning you sorrow into JOY!

Do remember that as a single women you have every right to enjoy this holiday season as any other couple or family does.

So find ways to be merry and jolly during this festive time.

Whether this means, decorating you home or house; and if you do GO ALL OUT!  Or, spend time with family or friends.

Just remember, hanging out during the holidays is a personal choice. Before you start caravanning to holiday party after holiday party, ask yourself, will attending this chin ding make me feel more depressed? Or will it bring others and you measures of happiness and JOY!

As a single person, make sure you set boundaries and levels of expectations for the holiday season.

First and foremost, HAVE FUN; however, do not pressure others into unrealistic or unattainable expectations of what the holiday time should bring (.ie. expecting to be with certain friends and family that do have significant others).

That way, if things do not go as planned with friends and loves one there will be less disappointment and hurt.

During this holiday season, remember Jesus said in Acts 20:35 “it’s more blessed to give than to receive.” So, make sure during instead of being so self –absorb with why you are single and spend this holiday doing acts of services to and for others.

Doing things such as feeding the homeless or those less fortunate;  consider visiting the sick and shut-in in nursing homes this will most definitely  help you put the holiday season into the proper perspective, AND  it will cause your spirits to be overjoyed with gratitude!

Others things you can do to keep you mind off of being single, find a Christian singles group or church in your area where not only you can support, but you can also give support to other singles during the holidays.

If you’re up for being a part of a single group; maybe consider throwing your own singles holiday bash?

Lastly, but most certainly not least; being single does not have to be a time to be ungrateful for what God has already done for you so.

Make sure to count every blessing the Lord has granted to you during the past year.

Holiday Don’ts for Singles

Avoid the temptation to be over indulgent in drinking too much alcohol (Ephesians 5:18) to cope with holiday stress and loneliness because this tends to make one depressed.

As singles, during the holiday season you may tend to want to overbook yourself to the point of utter exhaustion. It’s been said the act of unrest and body fatigue can lead to negative thought patterns.

Make sure you do not do this; but give yourself plenty of time to relax and rest. Down time is key during this time; enjoy the opportunity of not having to occupy your time and energy with going out and enjoy this time with yourself reflecting:

  • Journal goals
  • Pamper yourself nice massage
  • Enjoy watching favorite Neflix or Holiday movies

DO NOT allow your family and other couples to monopolize your time, but split the time to be with single friends as well. This will help you keep a more positive perspective while enjoying everybody’s company.

Overall, however you choose to celebrate Holidays, remember to be safe, trust in God’s promises for your future (Jeremiah 29:11) and have fun just getting to know you during this single season.

Want to learn more about Brandi and Ebony and Pink Pearls? Click here to connect with her today! 



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